It has been over a year since I blogged on this page.  I don't know what will come of it, I just know that I am feeling a little down.  I see and understand so many things as I cross the threshold of forty.  I see that at my age, wisdom finally set in, however, no one has time to listen.  We all move so fast in this fast-paced life and become jealous of those who move slow.  We call them lazy and unmotivated.  However, friends, they are the ones who have taken the time to savor every moment of this gift we call life.  A meal is not enjoyed when it is too much, when it is scarfed down at lighting speed, or when it is over-spiced with flavor.  Let's slow down. Let's enjoy every bite of the dish we call life.

-and the church said amen

notes #11- Self-efficacy

Bandura’s (2001) presentation of social cognitive theory shows the complicated systems of the human consciousness by highlighting the many avenues of experiences one can have. Thinking is a part of the human experience. Social cognitive theory explores how thinking is developed through the influence of one’s environment. When we start to look at what makes someone successful, we are exploring more than just the cause and effect of outside stimuli, we must examine a whole picture of what determines this success (Bandura, 2001).  We also explore what drives behavior through human thinking and reasoning.  Bandura’s (2001) explanation of self-efficacy suggest that success takes planning, goal setting, and self motivation to encourage oneself to overcome.

Through this experience of my doctoral journey to achieve this degree, I understand how important it is to be around a group of like minded individuals with similar goals.  More important than being in this type of environment, is to be aware of the unique opportunities of learning available in such a potential filled space of growth. If one does not appreciate his space of growth, he might miss the opportunity to learn from his environment.  If one does not know where he is going, then how can he know what he is supposed to be learning? Hence, I agree with Bandura (2001) and the importance of having a mindset to think through planning, to be a self motivator, and to be able to self-reflect. These are the tools that I plan to hone in on and grow in. These are necessary to be successful in my plans to achieve. One cannot grow in an environment where there is no food to feed him, and so it is with the knowledge that we are receiving from this program. The capacity to observe and absorb the information will only grow through using tools such as setting goals (more importantly writing them down), knowing your reason why (your true motivation) and self-reflection (journaling/review/ meditation). These are the tools that I am going to use to constantly grow in my academic research and writing.

Bandura, A. (2001). Social cognitive theory: An agentic perspective. Annual Review of Psychology, 52, 1-26. Retrieved from https://lopes.idm.oclc.org/login?url=https://search-proquest-com.lopes.idm.oclc.org/docview/205845107?accountid=7374

Podcast POST- Death by Asphyxiation

The Spiritual Implications of Racial battle fatigue are as follows:

YOU TIRED!!!

Racially Battle Fatigue is a scientifically researched and proven theory about how prejudice, micro-aggressions and racism slowly chips away at one's self confidence and identity as a valued member of a society.  Systematic racism is a spiritual attack that will not be properly addressed until the people of God return to camp to receive a spiritual healing and renewing.

I wanted to share with your the work that I am doing as a follower of Christ.  I don't want to say that I am necessarily a member of the Black Lives Matter Movement, but I do believe that my content support's it's message.  I am a Christian Blogger and I speak and write form a Christian perspective.  I believe that the Lord has given me great insight on what is going on in this world and is showing me how to navigate through confusion.  The enemy is coming in like a flood!!  One of  his tactics is to over stimulate, over crowd, and cause confusion.  

DO NOT BE CONFUSED IN THIS TIME!!

We don't have time to be confused!!  It is time to get focused!! It is time to return to the Lord so that we can get the instructions on what to do next.  This is why I do the podcast. . . All the Things you need to know about the end of the world!!  The enemy is the author of confusion and I think a lot of people are confused about what it means to return to the Lord. . . 

Returning to the Lord simply means rebuilding your relationship with God through Jesus Christ.

Check out this episode of  "All The Things"

DEATH BY ASPHYXIATION

https://anchor.fm/allthethings-endoftheworld/episodes/Death-by-Asphyxiation-S2-E12-efl949

Keep moving forward

What do you do when you don't know what to do?

Stand

Keep standing.

Be unmovable, steadfast, and always pursuing the work of the Lord.

Reflection of George Floyd Murder - I Live America?

A lot of things going on in the world right now. There are a lot of opinions in Black America about what should be done about our justice system. Another unnecessary death of an African American male by a police officer has caused major disruption in this country. I don't think rioting is the answer. We have to be wiser, more strategic; we have to learn this game to change this game. I have many feelings surrounding the death of George Floyd, who's death was just confirmed to be a homicide. The autopsy pronounced it as:

"asphyxiation from sustained pressure"

when his neck and back were compressed by Minneapolis police officer causing his suffocation.


It seems like this is what has been happening in our community since we have been transported to this country. We are slowly being suffocated by the pressure of societal norms. We think we are living but we don't see that our lifestyles are killing us. Why does America not function as the land of the free for a people who helped build it? Why do we still have a slavery mindset in the land of the free?


I write to figure it out:



I’m cold here

Not loved by the loving stripes and tattered souls that claim the claim of victory old

I crave the love that freedom molds but lie awake from the lies it’s told

I in fear, I run, I hide, fighting with the fear inside

I rise, I fall, pushed down to get dead, it is so hard to lift my head

Crying voices, expectancy choices, yell out, stay down, stay down

Then crack crack boom, and the scream it shakes, visions terrorize me, my soul it breaks

No one can see how my body aches, the scars are hidden inside of me

I’m down, I’m down, how far should I go? I’m already broken, I’m already sold

I’m so cold here, for my former shelter, no replica, I lost my home long ago, now I live America




I’m cold here

I try to live the best I can, making a living to live again

I’m the self that tells self you can, keep going, keep striving you’ll make it my friend

But something has happened and something has changed,

The peace that I felt has become rearranged,

I saw him, I let him, I left him alone, not sharing the fight that he goes through alone

I cry for my sons with a deep pitiful moan, a weeping concern, a crunching soul groan

No one can see how blindly I roam, searching, not finding the comforts of home

I’m trapped in a hope that was lost in delusion, a toil of youth, a seed of confusion.

I used to live in a world full of hope, humming freedom of fa la la,

but now I cry out, oh how do I live,oh how do I live America




I’m so cold here

My heart filled with unsettled doubt of why I am here and what’s it about

My wilderness is common and comfortable and calm

I sit in complacency and a lackadaisical fortitude,

I flow with the sea, no cares and no attitude

No healing for myself, and nowhere to go

No shelter, no home and always so cold

This lands dark hold, hides my inheritance my soul does crave

But to this country of Liberty, I’m shackled to fear, and oh yes I do behave

History lost, and stolen and buried, I don’t know who I am, I don’t know who I was



And this is the dream you want me to live, when I live America’s




I'm cold here

I'm dying

I can't breathe

America

My black year: Maggie Anderson at TEDxGrandRapids

3 day in 1 day

I have been waiting to see how I would adapt to my new 3 day in one day schedule as suggested by Ed Mylett.  I usually used a block schedule method to plan out my day and it works well for me.  The idea of 3 days in one day is the concept that each block consist of a routine.   In this routine you have goals for each block.  These goals should be major movement goals that will help you move forward with your life.

For example:

Block 1 consist of my morning walk, prayer time, tea,  some type of organizing or cleaning in my house, and ends with me writing this blog.

Block 2

I take a movement break, I continue with my writing, tea break/mind break, school work, and then I plan out what I have to do in this block the next day.

Block 3

I take another movement break in order to transition into my last day.  If I have to, I cook diner.  After diner is cleaning then relax time, and then bedtime routine.

That is a brief description but in my head a routine is forming that goes something like this:

6-11 am
Self Care Time

11-11:30 -Transition

11:30-4ish 
Work Time

4-4:30 Transition

4:30-8:30 pm
Family Time

9-10- Transition to bedtime with additional self care

And I don't feel guilty about it because I realize that me taking care of my head space helps me do my work more efficiently and it helps me have enough energy to invest in my family.  Not everyday goes perfectly as planned and that is Okay.  Routines are subject to life happenings.  It is always wise to be wise about being flexible.  I always leave that transitioning time in my schedule because it does take time to get your mind right about the next thing I have to do.

My 3 day in one day focuses on God, Work, and Family.  These are the things that I prioritize.  These are the things that keep me in harmony.  These are what I choose to invest in.

This might work for you during this time of quarantine.  You might find another way that works well for you.  Just remember, what ever you put into life is what you will get out of it!

Remember to live life on purpose

Until Next Time
Tamorra